In the name of- Updating my Blog..!! - 3

1)Just because I did not update my blog, you people need not do this. Become responsible citizens; be friends with nature. My sincere request-

2)First things first, I have been in the well. Have you been in the well too?? I will keep you in my prayers (to Shaktiman), if you’ve not been in the well, don’t you worry.

3)I said “First things first” in the second point. Kick me on my backside.

4)Oh My God! I am unbelievably intelligent. Look, how well I tackled point 3.

5)I was asked to stay at home today apparently because people thought I was too “HOT” to handle. I floated on ‘cloud nine’ until mom gave me the killer punch; she told it was just ‘fever’. Environmentalists say it’s ‘Global Warming’.

6)I’ve learned to cook a few dishes lately. The word spreads so fast; it’s been a month since a guest last came home.

7)I know I waste time on the internet. But, what did great people do?? That guy Newton sat under an apple tree.

8)On deep introspection, I found a common word that wrecked my life; TABLES. In school, it was the ‘Arithmetic multiplication tables’; and then there were ‘Dining Tables’.

9)I asked my friend- “How did you spend your weekend??” He replied like Mr. Cool-as-cucumber, “I was ‘hanging’ with my friends.” I didn’t meet/talk to him ever since. I’m scared of ghosts.

10)I met this guy recently, and somewhere in between our conversation I told him- “I’m presently suffering. This bloody Writers Block.” He asked me innocently- “Is there a separate block for writers in your Apartment??”

11)I gave Roshan an invaluable advice- “When a girl is explaining how much she loves you, you should not interfere to correct her grammar.”

12)Hey guys, do you remember Dhoni? Yeah, the same guy, who once upon a time had long hair, which made girls lose their minds. Remember? Yeah, he went to Afridi before the match and threatened- “One more win and we’ll send Rakhi too.”

13)Roshan, who had an exam that day, told me- “My bed is full of books.” I advised him to sleep on the floor.

14)I guess you guys would remember the way I used to blow steam into your ears with all my Kidnapped-by-the-American-President dreams?? Here’s an update if you care. I’ve migrated from America. Later, I fell for an Italian girl, whom I met in an Indian Passenger train.

15)I told Roshan- “I have a cruch on ‘Mayanti’.” He thought I said- “I have a crush on ‘My Aunty’.”

16)Wow, it’s true. My grandfather had a farm. Not on facebook.

17)I’ve been giving Roshan a lot of advices lately. He told me he wanted to become the best ‘Neurosurgeon’ in town. I told him to relax and take it easy, cos the day I break his head, then the only person who could save him would be ‘HIM’. Irony.

18)My computer makes all sorts of grunting sounds nowadays. I think the Mother board needs a father board.

19)Breaking News: During the match, Maradona burnt more calories than his players.

20)I watched a 20-20 game between Essex and Middlesex yesterday. I thought ‘Star Cricket’ was a family channel.

This is for you, if you are not exactly a Genius-

Well that’s it for now. See you. Take care. Be in the well. Don’t forget my first point. ;)


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