Heavy Party..!!

Me and Roshan, after a brain storming session filled with arguments came to the conclusion that we should also include a greeting card along with a birthday present (a monster gorilla) to his neighbour’s kid- Nikil a.k.a Dangerous Darling, on his birthday. We bought a Birthday card on which I was about to write the regular- ‘ With Love from……’ when Roshan interrupted in a way they interrupted marriages in movies. He said to me- “ Even pharmacists are clueless about your hand writing. Give it to me, I’ll write.” A lady standing beside giggled trying to look at the ceiling. I’m basically dust-proof, rain-proof and insult-proof. So, I just walked away. Anyway, after all that non-sense, we entered the party hall, which actually looked like more non-sense. Nikil ran to us and we wished him and presented him the gift and the card & in return he gave us Birthday caps (cones) and paper trumpets (we call it pee-pee). I blew hard with it and all the kids followed suit, which made me close my ears and made their parents’ BP levels rise. People who knew me well enough, in a weird way could conveniently establish the relation between- Parents’ BP levels and me. That didn’t make me any prouder, but as I said, I was insult-proof.

Anyway, they served us a ‘Welcome Drink’. Holding the drink we found a seat for ourselves. While I could finish a glass of juice in 4 seconds, Roshan takes 4 minutes. He’s like a lazy senior citizen. Meanwhile one known ‘aunty’, who was extra-large in size came by and said to me with a wicked, disgusting smile- “ You have gained weight. You were so good looking.” The happiest person on earth at that point of time, Roshan replied- “ Aunty, I have a six pack. Did I tell you? ”
Aunty smiled and looked at me waiting for a reply. I thought about many replies but said- “ He has a six pack. I have a family-pack.” She laughed but wasn’t amazed. Who cares?

Then, dinner was ready for me and I was ready for dinner. My plate got so jam-packed that I couldn’t even see the plate. I found a seat to hog on to the stuff on my plate. Meanwhile the kids put color papers and some scrap on my head and took snaps. They loved me like hell. I was reminded of the joke- “I have just returned from a children's party. I'm one of the survivors.” Roshan dint find any girl, so he sat quiet. He suddenly went to a two year old kid and started talking- “ chu chu chu… chu chu chu…” and I began to wonder who was two year old. Meanwhile that extra-large aunty came by along with her daughter. She pointed at me and told her daughter- “ Go ask him if that is a basket ball or his tummy.” They both giggled. They themselves were extra large and that tested my ‘insult-proofing.’ It was time to show my ‘man-ness’. I looked out for Roshan for company but he had already found a girl and was talking some crap like how much he liked ice-creams.

Anyway, I walked to that aunty and her daughter. The children just started singing- “ Humpty Dumpty…” I asked aunty curiously- “ Aunty, do you measure your weight in a weighing machine or a Richter scale?” and sang along “Humpty Dumty sat on a wall…” with the kids.

22 additions to the crap:

Aarthi February 9, 2009 at 6:33 PM  

Lol..Good one again Arjun!

Hehehehe...Control hi nahi hota! :P

Weighing machine or a Richter scale...lol!

Good going...and I must say... "reduce your weight re...!" :P



Akansha Agrawal February 9, 2009 at 7:13 PM  

Hehe.. sahi mein heavy party thi! And 'insult-proof' waah waah.... you do come up with mind boggling stuff yaar!!! :D

Anonymous February 9, 2009 at 7:23 PM  

haha...hilarious...very funny pic :-)

Richa February 9, 2009 at 7:37 PM  


insult proofing yeah indeed it made me roll on the floor :D

gr8 one from u again :D

Saket February 10, 2009 at 7:51 AM  

C'mon Arjun, insult-proof!! How does one achieve that... Loved it... was laughing like anything..

And amazing end to it all -- Aunty, do you measure your weight in a weighing machine or a Richter scale?

BTW, was the aunty an opera singer.

Anonymous February 10, 2009 at 8:10 AM  

Haha...that was funny!

sunny_raju February 10, 2009 at 9:25 AM  

I Wont comment

Anonymous February 10, 2009 at 10:32 AM  

Dust-proof, rain-proof and insult-proof, eh?

Nice! As usual you make laugh :)

uchiha tejesh February 10, 2009 at 5:12 PM  

hehehe, the ending was unexpected :D
LOL @ Richter scale & insult proof

Thoorika February 10, 2009 at 5:38 PM  

Aunty, do you measure your weight in a weighing machine or a Richter scale?

I would have loved to see the emotion on her face at that time!!!

Navchawla February 10, 2009 at 7:10 PM  

haha...good one yaar...the best part was your family packs...lolsss...
i m still laughing like anything!!

Misty Rhythm February 10, 2009 at 8:44 PM  

heeheheh...stupid woman, i think she deserved it :P

insult proof...really?? hhmmm

jack February 11, 2009 at 1:10 AM  

he he nice one arjun,
best was “ Aunty, do you measure your weight in a weighing machine or a Richter scale?”

lolzz loved it

Asmita February 11, 2009 at 8:38 AM  

Dude, that fat lady in the pic was the face for the anuty.. my imagination has gone south. :d.. but the aunty seemed disgusting in my imagined action replay :D

Tara February 11, 2009 at 6:43 PM  

Saving like hell now! Anyone who wishes to contribute is welcome! :D How do you come up with such great one-liners? What is the secret of your energy? (Don't say that health drink!) Lol! :P Good one yet again!

"Richter scale?" Hahahaha!

Arjun February 12, 2009 at 3:06 PM  

Thanks everyone :) :)

If u enjoyed and had a laugh.. Tats all i want... good ;)

@ Tara

secret of my energy?? My grand-daughter... hehe

Wat ever u r saving na, keep it for ur internet bill.... It's recession time na.. I dont want it to affect the cost of my precious hand.. :P

Cursed♪♫ February 12, 2009 at 4:08 PM  

You have a great blog! Love the layout !! It rocks ! :)

Shimmer February 13, 2009 at 12:39 PM  

Loll!!, thats a nutty thing to do :D, u forgot to mention the multiple reaction on the aunty's face :P

had a nice laugh :D

ullas February 13, 2009 at 7:26 PM  

real funny...brilliant ending..:)

Dipti February 13, 2009 at 7:46 PM  

heheheh shit... that IS insulting..

i just don't know how to insult someone..i need to learn

Anonymous February 13, 2009 at 7:57 PM  

hey.. nice... kind o' stuff tht seems to happen in most gatherings u walk in.. i mean d huge aunt part of it.. totally fun post!


Mahesh Sindbandge February 20, 2009 at 1:19 AM  

nice one...wish i could have such one sometime.. :)
life is boring man....

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