Rendezvous (Out) Of Sorts - 2

(There was an earlier post of mine- Rendezvous (out) Of Sorts. This one is it’s sequel. Hollywood style, you see. You can read that one before you start reading this. If you feel that is too torturous a thing to do, never mind. Read on. And yes, it’s yet another fiction.)

Scene- I was walking my way to the ‘parking area’ of a crowded mall after watching a movie in one of the multiplexes in the same mall. As I was walking along, I spotted my friend rushing through people, with a worried, puzzled look on his face. It seemed as if he was running for life.

Me – “Hey buddy, what’s up?? What happened??”

Him – “White-house….White-house…..Where is the white-house??”, he yelled and cruised into the adjacently located restroom.

Five minutes later I notice him making his way out, wearing an expression, which suggested that he had just experienced the best part of life. He finally took notice of my existence and approached me.

Me – “I thought that was Taj-Mahal !! ”

Him – “No. The one at your home and mine are called Taj-Mahals’. A public toilet is a White-House.”

Me – “Welcome to ‘your stupid world of logicality’.”
He thought that was a joke and laughed.

Him – “Come here for a movie eh??”

Me – “Yeah, with my friend. And before you ask, it’s a guy. What are you upto here?”

Him – “Me just come for shopping with mom.”

Me – “ Your mom is here?? Then I’m outta here. Bye.”

Knowing her mom, who is famous for ‘blowing steam’ into one’s ears, I wanted to vanish out of sight as quickly as possible. So, I quickly turned and rushed but ended up almost bumping onto his mom. We were standing face to face now, with my face drowned in shock. I laughed at my bad luck. I would have cried if I was a child. Get ready to face the Devil’s Advocate, I announced in my mind.

She – “Oh, It’s you..!!”

Me – “ Yeah, it’s me.”, Mr.Noluck.

She – “Do you smoke?”
Where did this question come out off??

Me – “No.” Yes.

She – “I saw you smoking in your balcony the other day.”

Me – “Well okay, once in a while.”

This is one lady who derives extreme pleasures in bullying me. Her version of my bio-data suggests some un-mentionable stuff. All thanks to her son, one heck of a liar. That too a complete head-less, foolish one at it. The weirdest part is – he makes me a part of all his false stories. If you intend to search for a silver lining, here it is – he lies only to his mom.

I looked at him. He was busy typing away on his phone. My mind as ever, is foreboding something in-auspicious, which by the way isn’t such a difficult thing to do when his mom is around. My ever vigilant mind sent out warning signals which said – “Get out of that place, you ass.”

She – “So, how did your Birthday celebrations go?”

Another question out of the blue, nevertheless a dangerous question. I looked at him again, tougher this time. Just then I received a text message on my phone. It was from him. It read – “Last Sunday was your B’day. You treated me in ‘Coffee Day’. The girl sitting next to me was your girl-friend. I was accompanying her when you were in the white-house. That’s when my mom spotted me. Okay? Got it ?”
I stared at him and my awestruck eyes said – “ Screw your ass, you asshole.” He was gazing at the roof.

She – “How was your Birthday celebrations, Mister?”

Me – “It was good, aunty. I spent the evening with him and my girlfriend at ‘Coffee Day’.”

She – “ You have a girlfriend?”

Me – “Yes.” No.

She – “Anyway, we must be leaving now. But I still don’t trust you fellows. Lucky, you got away this time. See ya, Bye.”

Me – “Bye.” which in the exact tone meant – ‘please leave, I’m tired of you both.’

After bidding ‘good-bye’ and ‘finger gesturing’ my dear friend, I turned and headed home, rather pleased. My head is still held upright and I’m not pissed off even after meeting her, wow! a first time for me. I also had this silly feeling of my self-confidence being re-instated.

At home, I went to bed thinking about my friend, his mom and today’s incident, if you can call it so. As similar thoughts passed by, I received a text message on my cell and hell it was from him. It read – “This is your dear friend’s mother. Your friend forgot to delete his ‘Sent’ folder of messages and went to bed. My dear friend, I suggest you to write a book on how you got screwed every time you lied to an intelligent lady. Good Night. Better Luck next time.”
Screw the intelligent lady & her ‘not at all’ intelligent son. I learnt a lesson – Delete all the messages in your phone then and there. I did so not realizing that I had deleted my ‘examination time-table’ message also (for which I kicked myself later) and went to bed.


Dear Mr.Pushy..

When a relatively old lady with a forceful and a 30 year old professional smile( I guessed) said “ Welcome On-Board Sir ”, I was reminded it was an ‘Indian Airlines' flight and she was the air hostess. Yes, I was leaving to Mumbai on a business trip. Like a kid I had asked for a window seat which took them 15 minutes to allot. Anyway, I found the seat & settled. An aero-plane isn’t a right place for restless people like me. I grabbed a few peanuts & my radio head-set from my bag. The RJ, with an apparent hyper-excited tone said “ Good Morning Bangalore…” followed by some crap and a ‘day ruining’ song. My reflex actions were enough to switch off the radio. My theory on RJs – ‘Good Morning was their only line which made sense’, gained weight. The seat next to me was still empty. All my travel companions till date were men above 50, with whom I end up discussing politics. Maybe the person who allots my seat takes revenge on me for insisting on a window seat.!

Just as it was getting boring, I saw a person with round ‘Mahatma Gandhi’ like glasses, ‘L.K Advani’ like bald head & ‘Charlie Chaplin’ like walk, entering in. He was my lecturer in college for whom I had written a note – “ You Suck” along with my name in capitals, on the last day of college. He spotted me from the distance & waved. I couldn’t even manage a sheepish smile. I am a Gentleman. All the memories of him & college scanned through my mind like a high-speed slide show.

“I am from the air-force and I was a commander” was his routine dialogue in the class. And hence we named him ‘wing-less commander’. He, once pushed me into the principal’s office for not completing my assignment on time. So, I gave him an exclusive name- “Mr. Pushy”. He never liked me since Day 1 , the day when I came late & said “tyre puncture” not realizing that two other guys who were also late but earlier to me had the same reason to say. Poor little me, Joker of Day 1. The day when me and my friends bunked college to watch a movie, he called up only my dad & told him that he had spotted me in a theatre. I still can’t forget the giggle that got out of my dad & mom the same evening when my dad told me about the call & I raised a serious doubt – “ What was he doing near the theatre?”. Anyway, bottom line – He never liked me & I never liked him. Hence I had to hate my answer scripts and it’s evaluation.

Back to the present, he approached me and hell, his seat was next to mine. He had two bags with two striking locks to it of which I assumed the codes would be ‘007’. After looking after the safety of his precious bags, he sat, we smiled but said nothing. The aircraft, after running through the taxiway slowly entered into the main runway for take-off. I broke the ice and enquired “ Sir, do you remember me?”

“I’m not human if I’d forget you”, he said.
I was confused if that was a compliment. The plane gathered speed and just as it took off, he said – “ I SUCKED…”
The plane took off & we both broke into laughter. The journey went absolutely fine and I had found a new friend by the end of it.

(Hey guys, sorry I got it wrong in few logics like-using FM radio on an aero-plane isn't allowed and carrying 2 bags isn't allowed too. It was fiction and my senses were out in the loo....Anyway, I hope u concentrated more on the story..)


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