Sleep Until You Go To Bed..!!

(Going through a 50-50 writer's block, whatever that is. Not been able to write freely nowadays. I guess it shows as well. Anyway, pardon me if it's bad. But shtill, as i always say- Yenjoyy :P )


1.55pm, at my place.

I woke up to a brassy thud of my main door one week day. I strained my eye-balls to the corners of the eye to catch the clock but in vain. If you din’t know- laziness finds its nest in me ; I’m lazy in everything except in ‘being lazy’. So the question in hand was- how would I check the time, without actually doing as strenious a thing as lifting-my-head-and-rotating-it-towards-the-clock?

I set out with my analysis-

2 thuds per-day – both by Dad – morning or lunch time? – not morning, I couldn’t smell a Body Spray – so- lunch time – 1.30 to 2 – Dad’s office is 5 mins away - The time is 1.55 pm. I’ve slept for 14 hours – record-breaking stuff. Wow..!!

My phone vibrated like a ghost from under the pillow. – “Hello!” I sounded alert.

“Dude, me Roshan. Where are you?” You Idiot

“I’m in the Indian Institute of Science (IISc) preparing the software part of our project work.”

“That’s great. I’m in NIIT - ‘Networking’ class.” Bullshit

“That’s great!”

“I’ll meet you in an hour in IISc.” Get lost

“Nope. I’ll meet you in NIIT in an hour.” I announced putting my vocal chords into unnecessary strain.

“Nope. Let the place be Barista.” He finalised.

As I put down the phone, I raised my left hand to fetch the TV remote. Rambo on Star Movies. Perfect! With my slothful right hand I fetched the cold-coffee which I suppose would have been Hot-coffee when it was kept there. Anyway, when people (like my fat neighbouring aunty) ask me questions like- “ Don’t you exercise? How bad?” and stare at me disgustingly, I have a few ready-made words- “ I meditate for 14 hours followed by some finger exercises ( with my TV remote), then my arms ( by moving it to and fro, in and out of my mouth), my neck ( which shuffles repetitively between the TV screen and the coffee mug) and finally my legs ( basically by stretching them).”

Anyway, as the movie was interrupted with commercials of a tooth-paste-with-salt thing, I decided to head to the bathroom in search of my tooth brush.



1.55pm, at Roshan’s place.

“Bah bah black sheep, hav………..” he sang, abrupty paused and sprung out of bed like a clown. He threw a glance at the clock and yawned. “I’ve slept for 16 hours straight. Wow!” he told himself and continued- “ my dream… oh.. my dream… “ he tried to recollect. After 120 seconds, his bulb glowed when he could picture his abruptly ended dream- 3 ghosts with invisible bottoms surrounded him, manufacturing scary faces at him. Just then, a saint entered from nowhere ( like Rajnikanth) chanting- “Omm Sai Baba …. Omm Sai Baba..” He rested his arms over Roshan’s shoulder and adviced- “ My boy, chant a bhajan to praise Baba and he will take care of the ghosts.” Wasting no time, Roshan began- “ Ba-Ba Black sheep…..” and that’s when he woke up.

Anyway, he came back to the real world and retrieved a cup of tea which was placed on his book/tea-stand. He found his phone and dialled-

“Hello?”

“Dude, me Roshan. Where are you?” he enquired.

“I’m in the Indian Institute of Science (IISc) preparing the software part of our project work.” Bullshit

“That’s great. I’m in NIIT - ‘Networking’ class.”

“That’s great!” You dumb-head

“I’ll meet you in an hour in IISc.”

“Nope. I’ll meet you in NIIT in an hour.” Get lost


“Nope. Let the place be Barista.”




1 Hour Later

Barista was empty enough at 3 in the afternoon. A few tables were occupied though, with couples trialing each other’s faces. I found a seat, ordered some weird-named coffee and stared at good looking faces indiscriminately. Meanwhile Roshan rushed in hurriedly and sat facing me. He hooked his eye-brow and asked- “ IISc?”
I nodded and copied his hooking-the-eye-brow-thing and shot back- “NIIT?”
He nodded and looked away. Letting a few minutes of silence go by, I looked at him, bounced my eye-brows as if to ask him- “What?” for which he returned a half-closed eye. With all this non-sense, a third eye could easily mistake us for two dons finalising a murder or something. Anyway, another minute of silence passed and I cleared my throat and asked- “ How long?”

“What ‘how long’?”

“Ok. Me 14 hours.” I winked.

“Yup. Me 16 hours.”

“damn…” we lifted our mugs.

“Sometimes we stay up so late that we have our morning coffee just before we go to bed.”

25 additions to the crap:

Swetha Padakandla August 11, 2009 at 12:50 PM  

woooaaaahhh!!
great..
sounds like there are whole lot of lazy lathiefs in Bangalore!

but wait, what was that you people ordered?
can you spell that "weird-named coffee" plz.. :P :D

anyways, happy to see roshan back with full of laziness!

cheers

kasabiangirl August 11, 2009 at 2:00 PM  

lol...what an inspirational post;P

I can fully understand how difficult a task it is to lift your head and also rotate it...haha :P

Your post brought back memories of how nice it feels to be lazy :D

Ki August 11, 2009 at 8:34 PM  

Hahahaha :D

I miss my lazy days!

Ria August 11, 2009 at 9:05 PM  

ha ha ha!!this so reminded me of my college days....miss them a lot!

Arun Kumar August 11, 2009 at 9:35 PM  

he he...

not even rotating the head n checkin the clock...thats a new high point for laziness...

"With all this non-sense, a third eye could easily mistake us for two dons finalising a murder or something" lols...

funny write...

ABHISHEK SiM August 11, 2009 at 9:40 PM  

Till now I thought I was the laziest person on earth. Good to meet you.

Priya Joyce August 12, 2009 at 6:19 AM  

hahahah....u broke my record ..:P

huh! me tooo very lazy but .u surely r ma senr :P

subah ki coffee raat ko piyo toh joy dugna ho jaata hei ...u know bettr :P


lovd this specially the "brow raise" act at barista :P:P

tats wat i call it niway ;)

Harshita August 12, 2009 at 2:22 PM  

Wah Wah!!

Aapka jawaab nahi... sirji.. :) Tussi gr8 ho!!

hahaha... aur mujhey laga tha ki bas main hi ek akeli lazy hun... aapkey saamney toh main pairon ki dhool hun...

Last line ne toh mujhye clean-bowled kar diya...

NIIT or IISc?? wat??

parzi August 12, 2009 at 3:16 PM  

ahmm...if thats what u call a writer's block...then i want it toooooooo....muje bhi chaiye...
that was a wonderful post...so in future be lazy for everything but writing...coz if ur block brings out this...then do i need to say anythng else?????
great work!
keep writing...keep lazying..hahah..n keep spreading smiles the way u do!
god bless!

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:07 PM  

@Swetha

Laziness... read the other comments.. Its a nation wide thing... We r all united.. We r force... a force which cant be awakened from sleep .. :P :P

hehe... artha aytha?? mind it .. :P

Weird name.... god knows... i donno.. ;)

Thanks for commenting da :)

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:15 PM  

@Kasabian girl

basically i'm an inspirational figure... hehe.. :P :P

Good u understand my problems..... Such strenious things to do as soon as u get up ya.... :P

So.. for u lazy days was past.... good ya... Wonder when it will be for me.. ;)

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:17 PM  

@Ki

Welcome here.. :D

u missing ur lazy days... take this post as inspiration.. :P

@Ria

Welcome here Ria ..!! :)

Sleep well.. :P

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:18 PM  

@Arun kumar

hehehe.. Thanks Arun.. :)

@Abhishek

Hii brother... Good night..!! ;) ;)

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:20 PM  

@PJ

I broke ur record uh?? yay yay..!! :P

Just a reminder to u and others too.. This is FICTION... not completely real :P

*with raised eye brows* - Liked it uh?? ;) hehe

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:22 PM  

@Harshita

Thnku.. thnku ... *bows down* - No garland?? :P :P

haha.. u still have to go a long way in learning this art called laziness.... ;)

IISc and NIIT .. ;)

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Arjun August 12, 2009 at 5:24 PM  

@Parul

Too much of praise yar.... I dont deserve that much :)

Hope this brought a smile in u.. :)

Thanks..!!
Arjun

Anonymous August 12, 2009 at 7:50 PM  

Hello !! You blog is Very good. Lots of Lazyness is there .!! Ha ha ha..
But In actually The writing skills are awesome. Please Read My blog Also.. Orangy

Arps August 12, 2009 at 8:08 PM  

Attaboy!!!
New highs in laziness..
Me likes..
Me likes it a lot!!

:D

The Rat... August 12, 2009 at 10:58 PM  

lolzz.. seems only the second half was fiction... the former part was autobiographical rite??

Aanya August 13, 2009 at 12:46 PM  

lolzz.. reminded me of my coll days.. gr8 post

Rakesh Vanamali August 13, 2009 at 7:31 PM  

Lol! How I wish I could snoooze away! ;)

Saket August 14, 2009 at 2:43 AM  

Can I borrow that sleeping gene for a day from either of you... 16 hrs dude, that's like what i sleep in 3 or 4 days... i knw that feeling but it has been elusive for me for a couple of months now... btw, lovely piece of writing, refreshed some memories... cheers!!

Amber August 18, 2009 at 9:45 AM  

haha OMG
thats the perfect mental relationship
it makes sense
and its just like ugh -_-'
=)

((ps i'm terrible, I meant to comment on this like 4 days ago or something like that and got sidetraked!!)) forgive me!!

Anonymous August 23, 2009 at 5:28 PM  

all stories wit roshan r hit
lachu

Shalini August 24, 2009 at 12:16 PM  

Man, this is awesome :)...the feeling is very nostalgic though for me :)...

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